Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Mr. T's Commandments

I know I'm straying from the stated theme of this blog a little here, but I really wanted to share the most hilarious thing I've seen this week, a Mr. T rap video from 1984 in which he exhorts kids to respect their parents while he struts around punching out random teenagers. Like most things involving Mr. T, it makes no sense whatsoever. I think my favorite part of the video is where Mr. T saunters up to a group of "tough" teenagers (and by "tough" I mean they're about as threatening as The Fonz) and punches them down an abandoned elevator shaft while rapping these words:

Honor thy mother and father
The Bible makes it clear
If you break the rules
God help you, fool
You got Mr. T to fear!

Let that be a lesson to you, kids! If Mr. T catches you loitering with your friends, the Bible says he's allowed to kill you!

Interestingly, this song was part of an entire Mr. T-produced album full of songs that were meant to instruct children in proper behavior. You can see the entire track listing here. I think my favorite title is "Mr. T, Mr. T (He Was Made For Love)". Are you sure this album was intended for children? Anyway, here's Mr. T's rap video masterpiece. They just don't make them like this anymore. (They can't, they're been sedated)

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